STOVE!

That same night that I farted in his car, we were out in the orange groves around midnight after smoking a little. We were there for a while and eventually he had to pee so I pestered him, oh how I pestered, to let me watch him pee. I don't have a weird pee fetish or anything. I'm not into golden showers and I don't get off on people releasing fluids through their body parts (except semen, I guess, but that's more of a fluid plus a shit ton of LIVING SINGLE CELLED ORGANISMS or something). I just thought it would be really amusing, and somehow managed to convince him to let me. Or perhaps he just wanted me to shut up. He pulled out his dongle and did his business while I stood next to him, bent over, cheek pressed against his elbow or side probably, and watched. I also poked it and giggled.

This is why I'm single.